Four Years Ago

I was headed down the canyon

it was before she died and I wasn’t thinking of rocks

falling from the sky

I’d written a manuscript and someone called it good

so I was heading down the canyon

to accept an award and shake hands

to jump start a dormant career

and there was you

and there was you

and there was you

each of you there to help me

with a crash on the couch

a brush away of tears

a long night of wine and revelation

I was heading down the canyon

and you were watching the babies

not really babies anymore

and you were revealing secrets

not really secret anymore

there was space in my heart still

and you kept finding empty spots

to fill me and i kept finding words

to say more, to be more

I was headed down the canyon

escaped and released and strung up attached

my strings have heartbeats and expectations

I will make it back, I will make it forward

I was off to accept whatever was coming to me

before I left the house the election was close

it was the old house, the one we owned

the one that rotted, the one the bank took

it takes a few hours to drive to the airport

and when i left the house it was close

and when i got there he’d won

and it seemed amazing like maybe 

not everything is rigged against us

it’s four years hence 

we are almost all still here

in different configurations

the kids are older, we are too

mistakes take no more wisdom than before

so much in between years

so much i’m glad of 

so much still hanging there not quite reached

About Margaret Elysia Garcia

Margaret Elysia Garcia is the author of short story ebook collection Sad Girls and Other Stories, and the audiobook Mary of the Chance Encounters, and the co-founder and lead playwright of Las Pachucas, theatrical troupe. She teaches creative writing and theatre in a California state prison.
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